Kaitlyn Renee's Birth Day

Today our sweet princess is already two weeks old. Two weeks of the most exhausting but best days of my life. It's true that I have been waiting for this girl my whole life. I love my boys with my whole heart, and I have loved the last 10 years of just us. I wouldn't trade it for anything, but I've always dreamed of being a boy AND a girl mom. To get to experience the best of both worlds and fill my cup and my heart with all things blue and pink. To have her here with us now, to be swimming in the world of pink bows and pink blankets... it's literally a dream come true. And so is our girl. She is a dream all wrapped up in the prettiest, most adorable package, and we feel so blessed to have her. She's a pretty laid back little peanut who loves to be held and talked to and so far - only cries when she's hungry. And even that is more of a wimper and a whine than a full cry. ;)

Trying to write this post about the day of her birth feels a little overwhelming. I won't sugar coat it and say that our time in the hospital was pure bliss because it definitely had its challenges, but now whenever I think back on it, I get a little teary. Mostly when I think about those who cared for us while we were there. Allen Hospital has the absolute best nurses - I have sworn by it every time I've delivered a baby - and I have so much gratitude for Dr. Kaaki, too. My previous doctors - the women who delivered our boys - have both moved away. I was tasked with picking a new doctor this time around, and though I've always wanted a female doctor, I took a chance on a guy this time - after hearing so many positive things - and let's just say that I'm going to tell Dr. Kaaki he's not allowed to ever leave the Cedar Valley. ;) He was wonderful to me throughout my pregnancy, always making me feel comfortable, and he was a calming and soothing presence in the operating room during my most nervous of hours. And - when I had reached my limit with that uncomfortable hospital bed and just wanted to be home with my whole family - he read my facial expressions perfectly and told me that even though a c-section typically means a longer hospital stay - he understood my need to be home. And he did the best thing he could have done to help me heal - he released us a day early. He listened to me and he "got it" and made sure we were healthy but then cut us loose. And it was the best thing he could have done for us.

Anyways... the people that were with us for that 48 hours will always have a place in my heart. Those who bring babies into the world and take care of sore and tired mama's in the dark of night are heroes.

So without further delay... here's my attempt to recap our girl's birth day and the hours that followed.

Our c-section was scheduled at 39 weeks. I have a complicated history and a unique blood clot disorder that made this the safest route for us to take as far as our delivery plan. But to be honest, I was completely nervous and slightly freaked out at the thought of a planned c-section. Though Brandon was a c-section, it was an emergency one, and I didn't have to think about it for weeks and months ahead of time. And because it had been an emergency, the memories of it are a bit blurry and not all that clear. I'm pretty squeamish and the thought of being awake for my own surgery was slightly terrifying for me. I was grateful that Dr. Kaaki scheduled it for his first procedure of the day - right at 8am - so that we could wake up early and get to the hospital and get it all done. Nana Deanne came to our house before sunrise to be with the boys while Cody and I got checked into our room at the hospital and got me hooked up to all that "stuff." The boys - especially Brandon - were so incredibly excited. Nine months is a long time for kids to wait for something so big and special!

Right after we got checked into our room, nurses started coming in to prepare me for all the things about to happen. Unfortunately we had a rough start when they couldn't get my IV in - having to try three times and eventually bringing in the "big guns" to get it inserted correctly. That didn't help with my nerves any, but shortly after it was in, the boys, Cody's mom and my parents showed up, helping to distract me while I waited to be taken into the operating room.

And right at about 8am sharp, Dr. Kaaki walked into my room to walk me back to the operating room. I remember being surprised that they didn't wheel me in there - with Brandon, it was so rushed that they just whisked me away in the hospital bed from one room to the other, but with our little miss, I had to get up and walk myself there - even with everything I was hooked up to! Our family found their spots in the waiting area directly outside the surgical doors, and I did my best not to cry when I said a quick goodbye to the boys. I handed our camera off to nurse Angie - who I didn't remember but who remembered us from over eight years ago - she was in the operating room with us for Brandon's birth and has now captured pictures for us for two out of our three babies!

And then came one of the hardest moments of our delivery. First of all, the dads aren't allowed in the c-section room until the mama is completely numb and lying flat. I remember that being hard for me with Brandon, and it was hard for me with Kaitlyn, too. There I sat on the edge of the surgical table, hunched over and praying for a smooth spinal injection... without my main support system there to hold my hand. And unfortunately, our anesthesiologist struggled to get my spinal inserted correctly! He had to poke me in the back in several different places, and it took quite a bit longer than normal to get me numbed up. I was getting increasingly frustrated as I sat there miserably uncomfortable, trying to stay still and hunched over - without my husband and thinking about my family waiting outside wondering why things were taking so long. The nurses did everything they could to keep me calm and ease my discomfort, but I sensed that they were getting frustrated, too. And my poor anesthesiologist - he apologized numerous times after it was all said and done, but once he did get me injected correctly, he was incredibly kind and comforting and helpful to me throughout the surgery and in the days that followed.

But - once I was all hooked up and numb, everything moved incredibly fast! Cody was finally able to enter the room and be by my side, and after getting dizzy initially from the spinal meds, they adjusted my dose and all I felt was warm and calm as I waited to hear my girl's first cry.

The moment she was born... I'm so thankful to Angie for all of these special pictures!

She didn't cry long - just enough for me to hear that she was okay - and they didn't take long to put her on my chest. I was so grateful for that. Due to minor and short-term complications with both Jaden and Brandon, I was not able to hold them in their first few minutes. Kaitlyn came to me almost right away, and having my daughter on my chest was one of the biggest answered prayers of my lifetime.

A protective Daddy already!

She weighed in at 7 pounds, 7 ounces, our smallest baby yet, and measured 20 inches long. Dr. Kaaki predicted a week before her birth that she would be about seven pounds, and he was right!

Again, our anesthesiologist was so apologetic for struggling to get my spinal inserted, but he was so caring throughout it all, and I am grateful to have pictures of my "team."

Daddy's first time with his girl. I love how big his hand looks holding on to her.

The longest part of the operation was getting me closed up afterwards, and I did have some discomfort during this process, as my uterus was contracting like crazy during this whole time period! The spinal concoction numbed me up good, but it was pinpointed to certain areas, and in other areas, I could still feel pressure and force. But when I was finally stitched up, I got to take my girl in my arms and present her to her adoring and waiting family... who up until that moment, didn't know her name!

These pictures are so cherished. I love them so much.

The rest of the day was a dream. I stayed comfortable for a good 12 hours before feeling any pain, we had a number of family visitors, and I felt a huge weight off my shoulders with the operation being over, and our girl being healthy and with us.

And the moment was finally here for the boys! We let them be the first ones to hold her, and they actually had a rock, paper, scissors contest at home earlier that week to decide who would get to hold her first. Brandon won. ;)

Such a cute gift from James and Cassi. This got a lot of attention from the nurses. ;)

My first time feeding her. She latched on immediately and has never looked back. She's a good little eater!

Our nights in the hospital were rough. I became very sore when my spinal meds wore off, and I was told that subsequent c-sections can be challenging because you have re-injured areas that have already been scarred and traumatized by previous operations. It took a while to get ahead of my pain with my oral pain meds, and I absolutely could not get comfortable in that hospital bed. My back was sore from being poked so many times, and my tummy muscles were too sore and not strong enough to go from a lying down position to an upright position as often as I needed to in order to feed her every two hours. I ended up spending our two nights sitting upright in a chair - getting almost zero sleep - and that is what ultimately led Dr. Kaaki to make the decision to send us home. In fact, our second night there he ended up having multiple deliveries and had to sleep in the hospital, too - and he agreed with me that the beds are awful. ;)

But this girl - she was worth it all. We love her dearly, and we relished every doctor and nurse that would check on her and tell us she was perfect. I have said so many prayers of gratitude that she is healthy.

She was born on a Thursday at 8:47am, and on Saturday morning we were headed home. Our favorite nurse - Katie - had put in an extra long shift during our second night's stay but when they finally told her she could go home, she ended up spending extra time in our room because she wanted to hold our babe some more. Kaitlyn, you are so loved!